THINGS NOT TO DO WHEN BIKING

I learned the hard way today. What not to do when trying to ride a bike for the first time in the Georgia mountains on a sunny day that, yes, has gears.

I had to chuckle out loud, and my brother-in-law Dick will LAUGH out-loud because, like motorcycle driving, I did not know what the gears meant and SOON found out, the HILLS got the VERY BEST OF THIS 50 year old body.

NUMBER ONE:
Do not EVER wear jeans to ride a bike or attempting to ride a bike.
NUMBER TWO:
Air in tires does a world of good.
NUMBER THREE:
Breathe.
NUMBER FOUR:
Do not lay down on the side of the road because your heart feels like it is coming out of your chest after riding - or attempting to ride UP a hill because, someone passing by WILL call 911.
NUMBER FIVE:
Keep Breathing
NUMBER SIX:
Remember, this is NOT FLorida and even though the bike you bought at the garage sale last year HAS 5 gears, it means ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in the GA mountains! NOTHING.
NUMBER SEVEN:
Stick to walking.
NUMBER EIGHT:
Do not think that the height of the seat that was set on the bike you bought at the garage sale was the right one for you and the person that owned it before had the same length legs as you do.
NUMBER NINE:
Breathe and get up off the side of the road.
NUMBER TEN:
Put a FOR SALE sign on the sucker. You're 50, call AARP and face the fact, you're old and out of shape.